Focusing and Coaching 12/19/24

Dave welcomed everyone and encouraged them to turn on their video cameras and say hello to one another. He also asked everyone to have something to write on and write with. Dave mentioned that he was joining from another computer to ensure he could see what he was displaying. He explained that the meeting was in the format of a webinar, a style of observed coaching he had always wanted to do virtually. He also mentioned that Brian, who had participated in several webinars, was present. JoAnne mentioned that she sees Mary Thorpe on Facebook and that Mary was going for a walk before the meeting. Anna also joined the meeting and thanked Dave for the gift she had sent.

Dave Ellis, the host of the webinar, welcomed attendees and specifically thanked Joanne Bangs and Bill Rentz for their contributions to the workshop. He emphasized that the recording would contain sensitive information and encouraged participants to reveal themselves authentically. Dave shared his experience in conducting similar coaching sessions and mentioned that he would review one of his books each time for the next two weeks. He also mentioned that Stan Lankwitz, a co-author, would be joining the session.

Dave discussed his strategies for personal development, which he had developed over the year. He mentioned that these strategies were shared in two webinars and were available for download from his website. He also highlighted the importance of reviewing these strategies and picking a topic for coaching. Dave emphasized the overlap between his strategies and the idea of becoming a master’s student. He also mentioned a new book with 21 additional strategies. The conversation ended with Dave encouraging participants to select a topic for coaching.

Dave emphasized the importance of focusing on the present moment, rather than dwelling on past regrets or worrying about the future. He encouraged participants to let go of burdens from their past and to focus on what they can celebrate or still need to address. He also highlighted the futility of predicting the future, citing examples such as the unpredictability of elections and weather. Dave’s goal was to help participants shift their attention to the present, reducing the impact of future worries on their consciousness.

Dave led a discussion on the importance of being fully present and focused in the moment. He encouraged the team to use tools like timers to maintain their attention and to be aware of their awareness. He also addressed the topic of fear, suggesting that when faced with fear in the moment, one should examine it in depth and consider the worst possible outcome. He emphasized the importance of self-reflection and the potential for growth through facing one’s fears. The team was encouraged to try these techniques for themselves.

Dave led a discussion on personal challenges and strategies for improvement. Michael shared his struggle with maintaining focus after a client session, while Dave suggested using the same focused technique in other areas of life. The team was asked to write down their current challenges and focus on one for the next 20 minutes. Jean expressed her difficulty in adapting to aging, while Brian and Rabbi shared their struggles with time management and scarcity. Dave then focused on Jean’s issue, encouraging the team to brainstorm multiple action plans to address their challenges.

Jean expressed her struggles with aging, feeling resentful about the process and her inability to do certain things due to arthritis and cataracts. She also shared her difficulty in accepting her single status and the lack of a life partner. Dave, in response, suggested a strategy of writing down these resentments on cards to help release them. He also encouraged others to do the same, listing their own struggles with aging. Jean added more to her list, including balance issues, reduced energy, and fear of looking old or foolish. The conversation ended with Dave’s suggestion to continue adding to these cards.

Dave led a discussion on the concept of dividing and conquering, using Julius Caesar’s battle plan as a metaphor. The team was asked to take one regret from a list, flip it over, and create an action plan to address it. Jean shared her regret of not being able to handle power tools due to arthritis, and suggested possible actions such as finding lighter tools, checking for adaptive equipment, or hiring a handyman. The team was encouraged to continue this exercise, focusing on one regret at a time.

Dave and Jean discussed strategies for embracing aging and maintaining independence. Dave shared his experiences of hiring someone to clean his gutters, highlighting the benefits of delegating tasks. Jean emphasized the importance of brainstorming one’s own solutions and receiving advice from others. They also discussed the need to welcome and celebrate help from others, as well as focusing on the present moment. The conversation ended with Dave encouraging everyone to love and celebrate their aging process.

Dave initiated a discussion where he asked the participants to reflect on what they were learning about themselves. He encouraged them to write down their discoveries and share them with the group. Dave also shared links to webinars he had posted, including one on intentional aging and another by his daughter’s organization, A Plan Coaching. He asked the participants to visit these links and share their thoughts and intentions.

In the meeting, Dave, Mary Thorp_WV, Angela, Anna, and others discussed their personal growth and strategies for addressing challenges. Mary emphasized the importance of not telling others what to do and the value of receiving from others. Angela shared her experience with grief and how it led to a solution. Anna decided to involve loved ones in her problem-solving process. Dave encouraged everyone to use their loved ones as coaches and to give themselves permission to reflect on their challenges. He also acknowledged his father’s influence on his problem-solving approach. The team agreed to reconvene in January for further discussions and coaching.