Meeting summary by Zoom’s AI, not edited
Quick recap
In this Falling Awake Webinar, Dave and Bill discussed techniques for fostering authentic communication, including sharing specific details rather than generalities, expressing genuine emotions, and listening attentively without interrupting. Dave coached participant Jill through her examination of her people-pleasing tendencies in her coaching practice, helping her recognize the importance of acknowledging her strengths while allowing clients to become their own experts. Participants shared personal insights about authenticity, including Bill’s practice of reviewing hidden agendas, Dave’s emphasis on speaking truthfully rather than usefully, and others’ reflections on how authenticity impacts their professional and personal relationships.
Summary
Authenticity Through Conversation Webinar
Dave welcomes everyone to the Falling Awake Webinar on August 14, explaining that the session will focus on choosing conversations, particularly around authenticity, and how to listen fully. He mentions that the webinar is being recorded and will be available on fallingawake.com, encouraging participants to fill out the participation form. Dave and Bill have prepared extensively for this session with the goal of helping participants improve their lives, and Dave introduces the first technique for fostering authenticity: modeling it by leading with example.
Authentic Communication for Deeper Connections
Dave explains techniques for creating deeper connections through authentic communication. He advises sharing specific details rather than generalities, expressing genuine emotions, finding safe spaces for candid conversations, explicitly requesting meaningful exchanges, and listening attentively without interrupting. Dave emphasizes the importance of asking open-ended questions that demonstrate interest while being sensitive to boundaries. He models vulnerability by sharing a personal experience of weeping about his wife’s Alzheimer’s, noting that sharing positive experiences can sometimes feel more difficult than sharing painful ones.
AI Dave Project Launch Discussion
Dave introduces his new project, AI Dave, which he developed with partners Bill and Rory as a supplement for coaching that gives people access to his books and assistance. Bill shares a technique for building trust by saying something risky to someone, suggesting that people write it down, rehearse it with a coach, and then communicate it, noting that while this can lead to breakthroughs and improvements in relationships, Dave adds that it can sometimes end or change relationships in unwanted ways.
Authenticity in Coaching Relationships
Dave asks participants to write about where they want more authenticity in their lives and what stops them, inviting volunteers for coaching. Jill shares that she struggles with authenticity in new coaching relationships, trying to be who she thinks clients want her to be, which leads to people-pleasing and appearing less confident. Dave acknowledges this common tendency and reminds other participants to focus on what they can learn from the coaching session for their own lives rather than focusing on Jill or him.
Overcoming People-Pleasing in Coaching
Jill discusses her struggle with people-pleasing tendencies in her coaching practice, where she often downplays her expertise to avoid disappointing clients. Dave points out that this stems from taking her strength of helping others to an extreme, and acknowledges her progress in being more authentic. Jill realizes she tends to minimize what she offers to clients despite believing strongly in the power of coaching, and recognizes that authentic coaching includes acknowledging her strengths and allowing clients to figure things out on their own.
Coaching Authenticity Role-Play Exercise
Dave coaches Jill through a role-playing exercise where she must authentically express her strengths as a coach. Jill shares that she’s intuitive, cares deeply about people, and sees them as puzzles to solve, but struggles when Dave asks her to direct these statements to him personally. Dave demonstrates the desired approach by modeling how to speak with conviction about believing in someone’s potential. Despite making progress, Jill acknowledges her discomfort with being fully authentic in an unrehearsed group setting, noting this is precisely why she volunteered for the exercise.
Authenticity in Professional Communication
Dave congratulates Jill on her performance and encourages her to be more authentic, sharing a book title “You don’t have to rehearse to be yourself.” Bill affirms that Jill is extraordinary and will make a significant impact when she shows up more fully. Dave emphasizes that authentic communication sometimes risks relationships but can lead to deeper connections, while Jean shares that using first-person language instead of second-person makes communication more authentic and personal.
Authenticity and Hidden Agendas
Bill shares that hidden agendas, even ones he’s not aware of, impact his freedom to be transparent, so he practices reviewing his attachments to help achieve authenticity. Dave builds on this idea, suggesting people should speak truthfully rather than usefully, which requires noticing hidden agendas. Jasmin-Martina discusses her realization that as a practitioner, her role is to help clients become their own experts rather than positioning herself as the expert. Eric reflects on how the demonstration with Jill helped him recognize his hesitation to promote himself authentically due to concerns about appearing arrogant.
